sometime since i last bought ... lately things haven been going on for me
i do realised my temper.... i've not being able to change it as much as i can ..
but all i know i am trying hard to change my temper.... seems as if it's starting to build up back again

i'm finding the best solution to divert it away


.... hmmm... when i said "i guess i still miss her ..." it means that i do miss her after all and not 'i think ' ...
damn sianz ...

my fuking leg is gone ... my both knee hurts so much that i could hardly bend it...
my ankle hurts so much :( that i ain't able to walk stand run or sleep ....

i hope it recover soon, i dun wanna anything to happen to me

but ... i'm not gonna give up
despite the pain i 'll bandage my ankle and knee tightly so that i can perform in next week's section field camp, i'll GO THRU IT! if i miss it .... i'm dead ... ppl!!! i so wanna recover soon

i still miss her alot and love , it's still affecting me so much ... so much so i can't concentrate

i didn't concentrate enough , what happen ?
i let my emotions rule over me , i finally understand that it will destroy me

it's starting to ...

my mind have been wondering about for the psat 2 weeks, so much so i haven been paying attention to classes and lectures and practices ...

i didn't get the chance to fire off the claymore mine once a life time :( :( :( tsk ...
haiz ... i'm FUCK UP

when there were only 6 to fire off the metador i was one of the top 6 ... 3 desmonds and others
this time ... 2 desmond ... excluding me :(

haiz... sigh ... so so sad ...
my life , screwed by my own hands!!!!



when she mentioned to me ... that she realised she had been missing out so much in life .
and ya true girl, i was able to say i can have any girl anytime .

tt was me last time . but i hope u know and understand that because i love u so much i didn't wanna upset or let u down.

I KEEP OUT OF CONTACTS FROM ALL OF THEM! I DELETED THEIR CONTACTS, I REFUSED ALL MEETINGS AND IGNORED ALL CALLS AND MSGES ...
i guess it's too late to say anything or it's useless already
because she found someone better than me and nicer to her

my TEMPER destroy this relationship ... suck right i'm fuck


i hope she's happy now ...


and i also realised i failed to understand the need to explain everything to her ... it's too late


too late to apologise ...
it's too late


DES.MATT'S A GONER ..... =)

friendsforever;
8:31 PM